Tell me
by Amnesie
Summary: Mostly a character analysis fic. Probably some cheesy Addex at the end
1. Chapter 1

Standing outside of the patient's room she silently watched the figures on the other side of the glass. He was at Jane Doe's bedside again. He spent a lot of time there-- an inordinate amount of time in her mind. She was all for patient care. She realized the benefit of superior treatment on a patient's well-being, but there had to be a limit. He had to be crossing some sort of line. Didn't he have any other patients? She knew he did-- and she _could_ find him more…

No, he was just doing his job… and doing it well. He was compassionate, caring, and involved-- and that was the problem wasn't it?

Watching his handsome face etched with concern, she sighed with acceptance of the truth. She always fell for the right man at the wrong time. Mark had provided her with so many things she'd needed: sexual desire, adventure, memories of a wilder age, a diversion from conventionalism. He could have been the right man, but she'd been married to Derek at the time. And now, when the opportunity presented itself, in the midst of their sixty days arrangement, he wasn't the right man. She was emotionally damaged and battered and needed not Mark's variety of excitement, but rather the empathetic, healing kind of ardor that could possibly last for a lifetime. She hated that he wasn't the man to provide that for her and that her instincts told her that Alex Karev was. Of course, she'd come to this realization when she was giving Mark his second chance and the intern had flat out told her he didn't want her.

If only she could say the same thing about him.

He looked up from speaking with Jane Doe and met her eyes. He smiled and she felt her breathing hitch. He walked towards her and she believed that she couldn't possibly have been able to move if her life depended on it. Joining her on the other side of the door, he came to stand beside her, their shoulders almost touching.

"Hey."

One word and she lost almost all her composure.

"Hey." She wait a moment before turning to look at his profile. Bad idea. He was rugged and masculine, even in such a sterile place-- a _hospital _for goodness's sake. And when he turned to stare at her with those eyes as he was doing now, she always became undone.

She hoped she didn't show such a vulnerability when he looked at her and guessed that she didn't as he continued to stare at her, obviously wondering why she had been outside the door looking in.

"Alex, I…" She stopped, not knowing what to say. She wanted to grab him by his scrubs and tell him that he was supposed to want her too, but the words were not going emerge so she just remained silent, hoping he'd miraculously understood.

Her heart skipped a beat as he nodded. He motioned towards the sleeping Jane Doe.

"I think she's getting better, don't you?"

She felt her heart drop to her feet.


	2. Chapter 2

He despised that she drew him in. That red hair longed to be smoothed by his fingers and her tense shoulders screamed to be massaged with a gentle force. Her lips needed to be kissed, but not in a way that would cause bruises, but would rather erase them. He sometimes thought her eyes begged him to love her, but that thought, the idea that anything was going to happen between them, was useless.

She'd seen to that.He'd heard about her arrangement with Sloan in the locker room. The girls had been discussing all of McSteamy's simply irresistible attributes-- exactly what he did _not_ want to hear. The news had felt like a blow to him, a quick swipe of a sword directly through his beating heart. While he may be just an intern, he'd thought she'd been able to see past that, through to who he really was: the Alex Karev that was a human being and had a lot to offer aside from surgical prowess. He'd thought that they'd had… something. He couldn't define it, but he would've sworn that it had existed. True, he'd told her that he wasn't interested, but she had to have been able to see through that. Him not ache with desire for her? Ridiculous.

But if she wanted Sloan, fine. He could accept that, though it would be very hard to walk away. The only thing he knew how to do in order to set himself straight was to push her away and dive into his work. Jane Doe may not be the captivating Addison Montgomery, but _she_ needed him.

* * *

The tension between them became more palpable than ever. She could hardly bear to look at him, fearing he would be able to read her like an open book and quickly translate her emotions. He found himself strained to watch her talk to patients in her practical, giving manner or bite her lip as she studied a chart. But worst of all was having to watch as she walked through the hallways with Mark Sloan at her side. Their eyes would meet, she'd give him her half-smile, and he'd have to turn away. He just couldn't do it. 

She was sick of it. The past few months, if you excluded everyone else from the picture and left just the two of them, had been pleasant and left her with optimism. There had been an awkward quality about their relationship, but it had felt sincere. The one kiss they had shared had only left her wanting more. He might not care about their bond, but she damn well did and it was driving her crazy. He could spend all his time with Jane Doe if he wanted, but she was his superior and he couldn't run from that.

"Karev."

She walked into the locker room and shut the door behind her. Luckily the room was empty aside from the man she was yearning for. He had been in the midst of changing and looked up at her, surprised and shirtless. His upper body was muscular and tempting; the senseless ideas that ran through her head only infuriated her because they were so useless. He'd denied her and instead of lamenting the rejection, she was only more alert to every movement he made and every scorching look he sent her way. No longer a resilient, independent woman, she was dependent on him. It made her incensed.

She walked up to him, putting her hands on his warm chest, and pushing him straight back against the row of lockers. He looked dazed, and as if he'd liked it, and that only pissed her off more.

"Alex, I've tried to be the upstanding , self-respecting, moral surgeon, but right now that's not me. I'm confused and stressed out and desperate with wanting you. Now tell me you want _me_. Tell me this whole… thing... isn't in my head. Tell me you're the right guy and that this is _our_ time." She paused, vulnerability causing her voice to tremble. "Please."

He smiled down at her gently and gazed into her expectant eyes. He took her hands into his own and moved them from his chest to around his neck and pulled her close. Grinning, he felt more liberated than he had in a long time. He massaged her back in a soothing rhythm and kissed her softly. She eyed him suspiciously and he laughed.

He told her exactly what she wanted to hear-- and more.


End file.
